Christmas

When we were young Christmas was about Santa and opening presents. I have until this year spent every Christmas at home with my family. Every year surrounded by the people that I love. I think that that is something that I have taken for granted. I would have wished for nothing but to be home this year. I think though that if I was home, the comforts that home brings me would sway me to not want to come back and that would be detrimental to my dream. I realized more than ever this year that Christmas isn't about the things you get, its about the people you spend it with. Life is about the people you spend it with. The one thing that I have had plenty of this year is alone time. Many people say that they like to be alone, but I think only people who have never truly been alone for long periods of time say that. I liked it at first. Coming home to my apartment, to my bed, to my clean area. I loved it at first, but day after day that begins to lose its luster. I would give anything to be home with my family. I think that humans can thrive on their own for a certain amount of time but you always need a home with family and friends. At least I do. Before we had a few days off for Christmas, I was struggling, I didn't want to get out of bed in the morning and I definitely didn't have the energy to do much of anything. I think that as silly as it sounds the lack of light and the lack of family and people around has really had an effect on myself. I love the journey that I am on, I love the life that I live and the people who make my life so special. It is hard to not have the constant love and attention and support that I do when I am at home. I am so grateful for the life that I have been able to have, the place that I was born, the family that I was born into. I am nothing short of blessed.

I had a very fun experience traveling back to Gothenburg this Christmas and even though I wasn't with my family, I spent my time with someone who loves hockey as much as I do, and who needed my company as much as I needed theirs. We ate good food, walk in the rainy Gothenburg weather, played hockey in a rink that I swore I would never go back to, went shopping for a Happy Light for me to bring back to Umeå, watched hockey and the world juniors and above all else enjoyed each other friendship and company. I keep a small circle but the quality of the people in that circle is incredible. The train was an experience, I left on the way there and on the way back at 1930 and was in a car with 5 other people. On the way there with a family, and on the way back with 5 random people. It was an experience and I really enjoyed getting on the train, getting comfy and then sleeping the entire way and waking up at my destination. It made the time fly by and was very comfortable. It is an experience that I won't soon forget and I hope that when my mom and maybe sister come they will be able to take the train with me.

I think that the most important quality of a hockey player is resiliency and I have think that over the last few months in Sweden, I have began to master that skill. I am ready to get back to work, I am ready to make points and help my team win. After these few days off I am hungry to put myself in a good position for next year and I cannot wait to see what the second half of the season brings. I am ready to be resilient and make my dreams even more of a reality.